Sabtu, 07 Maret 2009

How to Say No Without Feeling Guilty

Are you chronically over - committed? Rushing from one task to another, with no time for your self? The key is to have a strong vision of what you want to say yes to. Then you'll feel far more confident saying no. Here practical steps to say no without feeling guilty.

1. Decide which activities you truly love. If you say focused on those things, then the next time you are asked to volunteer or get involved in a time- consuming activity, just check in. If the request takes you too far from what you are already dedicating yourself to, it's easier to say no.

2. Get over the need to be nice. Stop being afraid to disappoint people, and let go of the sense of importance you get from being indispensable.

3. Be clear when you say no. No means no. Ambiguities like "Maybe after the first of the year "or" Let me get back to you" leave the other person thinking you're actually interested, when you' re not.

4. Practice saying no in non-threatening situations, when you have little at stake and success is almost assured. Then you'll work up to resigning from the board of directors and stop signing up for committe work. Learn that carving out time for yourself and your family requires no reason and no apology.

5. Say no to requests for money in simple language and give no explanation. Contribute to the causes that excite you and complement your values. Then you'll feel confident saying, "My contributions have already been allocated this year."

6. Keep it simple. The most effective nos are the least complicated. The more details you supply, the more likely the other person will challenge you or try to change your mind.

7. Make a compromise while you're learning to say no. If you're asked to bring cookies to an event, opt for store-bought sweets instead of slaving away in the kitchen.

8. Re-evaluate your current commitments. You may have agreed to a long-term commitments months ago but now see that it's not working for you. Talk with the people involved and come up with an arrangement that works for everyone.

Source : hello magazine, 2006

1 komentar:

ida mengatakan...

sebenarna td saya cm iseng2 browsing nyari2 ttg how to say guilty..
dan fortunetely, saya nyasar di blog mbak tri...terus saya coba liat profil mbak, wow..ternyata anda org klaten.
benar2 kebetulan yg menyenangkan krn saya juga org klaten.
klo boleh tahu mbak klatennya mana?